The World Series game last week got me thinking: What is it about a big team win that makes people wanna get all destructive? I have nothing against man-hugging a complete stranger when my team wins, but I have never had the urge to help other fans- of the winning team, mind you- flip over a car and set it on fire. Maybe I’m weird.
I realized today that sometimes after I see what time it is on an analog clock (the one with the hands), I double-check myself on a digital clock.
Sometimes when I write or type “their” it looks wrong until I re-do it as “thier.” I know the ‘I’ before ‘E’ except after ‘C’ rule, but it has always offended me because my name is K-E-I-T-H. I guess I am the exception.
Why is it that people never want to admit that they were asleep during the day? I will call a friend and say, “Oh sorry, were you asleep?” Despite the fact that they obviously were sleeping, they usually lie about it. I know I have. I guess we don’t want people to think that we are lazy.
Sometimes I put my laptop on my desk in front of my desktop. I start typing away and get frustrated because nothing works. Then I realize that I am typing on my desktop keyboard. This has happened several times.
Granted I would catch this much sooner if I typed like a normal human and not by hunting and pecking with just my middle fingers. It is fun to type a paragraph and then to actually look at the screen and find out that it was all for naught.
Somehow I managed to sign onto Yahoo messenger and some random wants to be my friend now. All I was trying to do was rename and save a file onto my laptop. And now I have a new friend! This is going to be a great day. I probably should buy a lottery ticket. Or just stay indoors so I don’t contaminate anyone with my tomfoolery.
I feel so blessed to be so smart.
This guy was lonely and so he decided life would be more fun if he had a pet. So he went to the pet store and told the owner that he wanted to buy an unusual pet.
After some discussion he finally bought a centipede, which came in a little white box to use for his house. He took the box home, found a good location for the box, and decided he would start off by taking his new pet to the bar for a drink. So he asked the centipede in the box,”Would you like to go to Frank’s place with me and have a beer?”
But there was no answer from his new Pet. This bothered him a bit, but he waited a few minutes and then asked him again, “How about going to the bar and having a drink with me?”
But again there was no answer from his new friend and pet. So he waited a few minutes more, thinking about the situation.
He decided to ask him once more, this time putting his face up against the centipede’s house and shouting, “Hey, in there! Would you like to go to Frank’s place and have a drink with me?”
A little voice came out of the box: “I heard you the first time! I’m putting on my dang shoes!”