Dos Equis’ “Most Interesting Man In the World”: Please keep ’em coming. You make me giggle.

Jack Link’s Beef Jerky: Please quit messin’ with Sasquatch. It is played out.

Miller Lite and Coors Light: Enough of the gimmicks. Your beer is fine as is. I don’t need blue mountains to tell me my beer is cold. I can feel that for myself. And you don’t need shotgun holes or vortex bottles. Your beer already gets to my mouth at an acceptable speed.